


Gone. Gone. Goner.

by xorhnnn



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: M/M, Sad, Self Harm, and it could be a massive trigger, please be careful when reading this, suicide implied, this is really fucking sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-21
Updated: 2015-12-21
Packaged: 2018-05-08 01:36:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5478413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xorhnnn/pseuds/xorhnnn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He knew he shouldn't be doing this. Not when he's perfect, beautiful boyfriend was waiting for him in his sitting room, willing to hold Tyler if he would just have some courage to tell him that "Josh, things are bad again". But he was doing this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gone. Gone. Goner.

**Author's Note:**

> please please be careful when reading this. there's heavy self harm in this and its fucking sad and pretty shit but please just be careful. also feedback is really needed & welcomed.

He was supposed to be happy, Tyler knew that. He was with his best friend, his boyfriend, he was loved but he felt completely and utterly alone. There was a constant voice in the back of his mind saying "you're worthless" over and over again. He wasn't sure how to make it stop.

 

"I need to use the bathroom." Tyler informed Josh, standing abruptly off the couch. He bolted to the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He sat on the ground, back on the door with his head in his hands. His breaths were coming short and his chest began to tighten. The voice was getting louder. "He doesn't care about you." "You should slice your hips." "You're a worthless piece of shit." 

 

Tyler slapped at his head as if to get the voices out. They didn't stop, if anything they seemed to get louder. He could feel himself becoming more and more panicked, his breathing becoming shallower. Then, suddenly, his head seemed to go quiet.

 

Before Tyler could breathe a sigh of relief, the voice inside his head let out an ear splitting scream. And then another. And another. Soon Tyler was able to make out the words. "YOU'RE A GONER."

 

Tyler helplessly crawled over to his bathroom sink. He yanked open the sink press and pulled out a pack of razor blades. He knew he shouldn't be doing this. Not when he's perfect, beautiful boyfriend was waiting for him in his sitting room, willing to hold Tyler if he would just have some courage to tell him that "Josh, things are bad again". But he was doing this.

 

He pulled a blade out of the packet and pulled up his shirt. It hurt to breathe now. He knew that if he just dragged the blade across his skin he might calm down. Usually that's what happened. He touched the blade to his hip, the coldness giving him goosebumps, and dragged it. The sight of the roaring red blood spilling across his skin made the voice in his head laugh and then breathe a sigh of pleasure. Tyler's breathe became shallower and his chest felt like it was caving in. He dragged the blade again. And again, and again, and again. All he could hear was the voice in his head screaming "MORE". He couldn't hear his own choking sobs or his beloved boyfriend screaming his name. Only when Josh yanked the blade from his hands, did Tyler come back to reality. 

 

"Josh. I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry."   
That was all Tyler could say as Josh helped get cleaned up and calmed down. Josh made Tyler promise he would get some help. And Tyler did. Only it was the wrong kind of help and Josh would never get to marry his baby boy after it.

**Author's Note:**

> dont forget to comment what you thought!


End file.
